Turtle Channel!!!

Free eye cream and lip gloss for us!!

Ye Chow and I had our research paper to the sensor technology conference in New Zealand accepted. So in November this year, he will be giving a talk on multi-layer perceptron and radial basis function states observer in Palmerston North. He will be stopping by Melbourne first for work and visiting his sis.





I had hoped to travel with him to Melbourne and then to NZ, AND have a great holiday with him in NZ. It would also have been good to see Subhas, Sunil and Serge again (who will all be there) but this will not be possible.





This is because our other research paper to a separate conference held at exactly the same time in a completely different country was ALSO accepted, which means I have to be the presenter for the other one since Ye Chow can't be in 2 places at the same time!

So it looks like he will be enjoying the beautiful scenery in NZ while I will be facing crowds in a busy city. There goes my "dream" of a holiday.

I am a self confessed klutz. I bump into just about anything. I have fallen down the staircase so many times that you would think I never really learnt to walk when I was a child. I still walk into the door on the occasional mornings when my eyes refuse to open. I have brushed my teeth with facial wash by accident before. More painful is the fact that I have smashed my toes against the side of the bed, through the opening and closing of doors, on chair legs and on closet doors more times that I can count. As a result, my legs and toes are almost always bruised at some spot or other.

Yes, I am a klutz. It's true. If there were a support group for clumsy people, I should probably sign up immediately.

Seeing that I am perpetually clumsy, Ye Chow talked me out of purchasing a four poster bed. I had my heart set on one, I always wanted a four poster bed!!! I want one!!!! But he kept reminding me that even without a post, I have been smashing my toes. If we had FOUR posts on our bed, I might lose a leg.

So we opted for the safest choice: A dumpling bed. The bed is white, and completely puffed up. The divan is a huge flat square surface to protect the mattress (which is very expensive - we got a good one coz we have been sleeping on crappy ones since we got married and our backs are killing us) . The sides of the bed are puffed up and bouncy, so that if I walk into the side, I will get no bruises. And head board is also puffed up and bouncy so that we can sit and read in bed very comfortably. Yes. It's a dumpling bed!

So I exchanged my luxurious 4 poster bed for a childish looking dumpling bed. But you know what? I really like the dumpling. A lot! It's great, it's comfy and it doesn't bruise me! More importantly, we got a couple of nice gifts to go with our bed. We got (for free) a nice 2 seater foot stool for the foot of the bed, and a couple of goose feather pillows! They are really comfortable!!!! Unfortunately, I haven't had the chance to try out the bed and pillows and foot stool. That's coz I haven't moved into my new house yet. Apparently it's bad luck to move during the ghost month (which is now) and very good luck to move in after the ghost month (which is the 8 month in the Chinese calendar). So we're still waiting to enjoy our new house and our new bed.

So there you go. A klutz gets a dumpling bed. A princess gets a 4 poster bed. Guess which one I am?

Since we were already there, we decided to stay until midnight to watch the fireworks (it was already 11.15pm by the time we got in, and 11.45 pm by the time we bought the boots). It turned out to be an absolutely spectacular 10 minute display of fireworks. It was fantastic. Marilyn said she felt like she was in a dream. Indeed we were wishing we got a hotel room nearby (where Marilyn's dad could get a 70% discount) so that we could be closer to the view without having to face the crowds!

After the fireworks ended, they played the liberty song, and everyone was singing and shouting accordingly! The atmosphere was so pumped up and happy that I began to feel warm all over and so very proud of my country! It's Independence Day! It's our National Day! 50 years of Independence and the chants and songs really made me feel so very connected with my fellow countrymen.

At about 12.30am, we walked into Ikea and did some more shopping. Marilyn bought a soft and fluffy baby blue throw for her sofa. Then we walked out to the stalls that were set up alfresco just outside the mall. There, I almost bought a kimono. Marilyn loved it too! Too bad they didn't accept credit cards. Anyway, we may go to Time Square (where their shop is located) to buy the kimono in future, probably during Christmas or something. We can always take a train there to avoid having to drive through traffic. We shall see.

1. buck teeth
2. awful hair
3. pimply
4. huge specs
5. bad posture
6. extremely skinny
7. pitifully undersized
8. socially impaired or disabled
9. giggles non-stop
10. talks very loudly and with false enthusiasm
11. tends to talk about themselves
12. asks strange questions about you
13. stares at you unflinchingly for long periods of time
14. has Grandma buying his clothes for him (i.e. clothes that even Mom won't buy)

I have just recently attracted another weird guy (my 5th one so far), who happens to know I am married but still doesn't seem to back off.

He waltzed into my office one day, happily telling me that he read about me in a magazine and wanted to introduce himself. He did. Then he started talking about his father, his life, his studies etc etc. All while I am busy doing work. Worst of all, he has really BAD body odour. I had to stop breathing to keep from choking to death.

He refused to leave my office. He sat down in one of the chairs and proceeded to stare at me when he ran out of things to say. After about 20 minutes of awkward silence interspaced with bad conversation about his life, I decided to tell him I was busy. He went "Oh, what are you busy with?" After hearing my reply, he proceeded to tell me everything he is busy with too. In the end, I had to MSN my colleague to come to my office and invite me for a meeting so that I had an excuse to kick him out.

My office smelled like a dead rat for 2 days. Everyone who entered my office complained about the stench. Arrgghh...

This weird guy kept visiting my office. Every time he pays me an unwanted visit, he would talk about something happy in his life and several times punched the air with his hands in a victory dance over some happy incidences in his life (e.g. an accepted conference paper, a holiday, an accepted journal paper etc etc). It's just so weird. He even tries to get me to talk about my spouse sometimes. I never facillitate him, because I don't like talking about personal stuff when at the office. Sometimes I wonder if the reason he keeps coming to me is because he has no friends.

We moved to a new office a couple of months ago. My new office is right next to my spouse's office. So now he visits me a lot less (GREAT!!)

Anyway 2 days ago, I went for a seminar with my female colleague and there he was sitting 4 rows in front of us. This weird guy kept turning around and STARING. My female colleague got freaked out. After about 20 minutes of periodically whipping his head around and staring for 3-4 minutes (i wonder why he didn't get a neck lash), he got up from his seat and moved to the seat in front of me.

I freaked out. I left immediately. My female colleague later told me that another colleague of ours asked her where I went, and the weird guy appeared to be eaves-dropping. She told him VERY LOUDLY that I went to call my Husband. Hahahaha.....

Thank God for friends like her!

Sometimes I swear I have a sign on my forehead that says "I am attracted to you" that happens to be only visible to geeks and freaks.

Lost in a sea of blue skies
Lie in the grass
That grows wild beneath my thighs
I guess it's summer time.

Winter had passed
As did the lies and truth,
I'm frozen inside
Yet seasons still renew
Perhaps the sun will shine through.

Let it fill my heart with its warmth
Let it feed my soul that I had scattered so long ago.
I'll fly away
Lost in a dream.
Help me redeem.

Lost in a maze of vanity
Seeking the pleasures
That never quenches my thirst
I thirst for more each time.

I heard a voice, so distant yet so clear.
It repeated the words
That I just refused to hear
A stubborn mind...
A deaf ear.

And yet is beckons me, here and now.
And it fills my soul that I had scattered so long ago.
I've lost myself
Chasing dreams.
Chasing in vain.

I wonder why my feet headed home.
It's been far too long
Yet somehow that's where I long to go
I've searched far and wide, yet it's here
All that I need,
Here in this sun
And in this rain
I live again.

Lost in a sea of blue skies,
Lie in the grass
That grows wild beneath my thighs.
Yes, it's summer time.

We have been quite broke recently, so we aven't actually gone out to eat a nice meal in ages. Actually since we have gotten married, we haven't gone out as a couple to a restaurant to have a nice meal.

Today, we decided to cook a nice lunch. I really missed Italian food, so it's pretty nice to have a good spagetti for lunch. We bought a nice honey mustard cream sauce from Australia, and decided to use it. We had mushrooms, mince meat, chicken ham and garlic mixed with the sauce. I also added cheese, white and black pepper to spice it up. Then we washed some fresh organic lettuce to partake with our lunch.

After some nice decoration on the plate, it looks like a restaurant level dish. I enjoyed it immensely, probably because I cooked it :)

What do you think? Does it look nice?

On Monday evening I finally met up with Radhika after so many months. She's now studying in the United States, so she didn't attend my wedding (sniff sniff). Anyway, since she came back for the holidays, it's been one problem after another for her :(

It's lucky she has John to support her, I guess :D And he's a pretty nice guy too. Anyway here's a pic of us together:

-Taken from Asia Sentinel-
by Darah Kacukan
Malaysia’s Malay leaders say ‘do as I say, not do as I do’ when it comes to marriage

In early June, the Malaysian media blossomed with pictures of Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi in the traditional Malay suap-menyuap ceremony, exchanging bites of colored glutinous rice with his new bride.

This low-key but high-profile wedding followed another elite ceremony in May when one of Malaysia’s most eligible bachelors, the Raja Muda (crown prince) of Perak, Dr Raja Nazrin Shah, finally got hitched at the age of 50 in an unostentatious ceremony in Kuala Kangsar.

But these two weddings had something else in common, a characteristic not much commented on in the media but clear to most Malaysians: in both cases the brides were locally-born Eurasians. The prime minister’s new wife is Jeanne Abdullah, a friend and relative of Abdullah Badawi’s late wife, Endon, who died of complications from breast cancer in October 2005. Jeanne had originally been Jean Danker, a Catholic from a Eurasian family which spans Malaysia and Singapore and who converted to Islam when she married her first husband, Endon’s brother Othman, from whom she was later divorced.

The bride of Oxford and Harvard-educated Raja Nazrin, son of the current Perak Sultan, who himself was formerly Malaysia’s top law official, is Zara Salim Davidson, a chemical engineer and the daughter of William Davidson, a British-born Ipoh lawyer and his Malay wife. She herself is a member of the Kedah royal house and thus related to Malaysia’s first prime minister, Tunku Abdul Rahman. Raja Nazrin has repeatedly spoken out against racism in Malaysia. Zara considers herself to be very much a Malay despite her Eurasian blood.

These weddings thus represent what should be one of the triumphs of Malaysia its ability to break down racial and religious barriers and subsume them into a broader Malaysian identity. Unfortunately the elite all too often fails to preach what it actually practices. It is a one-way street. Marry a Malay and you will become a Malay. You will also become a Muslim and, the courts say, you will stay that way.

The good-natured Abdullah Badawi clearly has no problem with the mixed racial ancestry of his bride, or with the fact that she was baptised a Christian. Yet he heads a ruling party which is not merely race-based but at times makes a fetish of Malay racial purity. And he heads a government that supports the recent court decision refusing to allow a Muslim to become a Christian, an act of supposed apostasy. But in the eyes of some Christian fundamentalists, the gentle Jeanne is also an apostate for having forsaken Christianity.

Malays are not the only ones with identity problems. Scratch many a Malaysian Chinese and one may also find a strain of Chinese chauvinism, as is often the case in Singapore. But in Malaysia it is the Malay elite which sets the tone. This is why many believe that a more open recognition of the sheer diversity of Malaysians’ origins would help offset the divisions caused by race-based politics that identifies religion with race.

Just a brief look at the origins of many members of the elite gives the lie to ethnic purity and religious dogmatism. There is Mahathir Mohamad, Malaysia’s longest-serving prime minister. His father was a Muslim Malayali from Kerala in south India who migrated to Malaysia and took a Malay bride. Mahathir himself was classified as an Indian when at university in Singapore.

But instead of celebrating the upward mobility that Malaysia offered to this migrant from India, the politics of the United Malays National Organisation required Mahathir to bury his ethnic past and wear his acquired Malay identity on his sleeve. In reality Mahathir welcomes racial mingling. His son Mirzan married into the family of Indonesian Chinese tycoon Liem Sioe Liong, and daughter Marina’s first husband was European.

The current head of the UMNO youth, Hishamuddin Hussein, who waved a kris (Malay dagger) at last year’s national UMNO convention and offered to bathe it in Chinese blood to the ominous cheers of the audience, is another whose Malay roots are not as deep as often assumed. His grandfather, the founder of UMNO, Onn Jaafar, appeared to be a Caucasian, which was not surprising given that his Johor-based family was of Turkish origin. Onn was ejected from the party he founded because he wanted to make it multi-racial and though his son went on to become the head of UMNO and a prime minister, he carried with him his father’s inclusive and moderate instincts.

Onn lost out politically to Malaysia’ s first Prime Minister, Tunku Abdul Rahman. Although the Tunku placed more emphasis on Malay identity, he was certainly no exclusivist. Indeed, he had been born a subject of the King of Siam and as a scion of the royal house of Kedah spent some of his early years in Bangkok at the court of his then sovereign. His mother was Siamese, though her family originally was from Pegu (Burma). Of his four wives, one was Thai Chinese, one English, one Malay and one Malaysian-Chinese. He never hid his fondness for whisky, even while heading the Organization of Islamic Conference, or his student days in England pre-occupied, as he once put it, with “fast women, fast cars and not-so-fast horses.”

The Malay aristocracy has anyway been quite catholic in its choice of brides. Those in mixed marriagesinclude Ahmad Shah, the Sultan of Pahang, whose consort is of Pakistani lineage. The Sultan of Selangor’s divorced second consort and mother of his heir apparent was an American citizen.

Sultan Iskandar of Johor’s first wife, the mother of his heir apparent, was a British woman, Josephine Trevorrow. In this respect Sultan Iskandar took after his own grandfather, Sultan Ibrahim, who had two European wives, one British, one Romanian.

Maybe it is Johor’s geography, its proximity to Singapore and the diversity of Indonesia, but its politicians seem to thrive on marrying outsiders. Former Deputy Prime Minister Musa Hitam’s first wife was from (Catholic) Latin America and his second was of mixed ancestry . Another Johor politician, Tun Ismail, deputy prime minister in the early 1970s, was of part Chinese ancestry.

Conversions of convenience to Islam often mean that Malay mixtures leave little trace compared with other cross-ethnic marriages. But the non-Malay, but Muslim, origins of many of the elite are found everywhere, from South Asia, Yemen, Egypt, Turkey and other countries. They include the likes of Zeti Aziz, the governor of Bank Negara. She is the daughter of Ungku Aziz, the European-looking former University of Malaya vice-chancellor, whose Johor-based family came from Turkey.

Chinese roots are also more real than apparent, often hidden by conversions. But relatively recent high-profile marriages to Chinese include Tengku Razaleigh, former finance minister and a member of the Kelantan royal house who married a long-time Chinese friend who converted and changed her name to Noor Abdullah. Rashid Hussein, the prominent Singapore-born, Anglophile financier whose father was Indian and mother Malay married Sue Kuok, a daughter of tycoon Robert Kuok Hock Nian, the Malaysian-born but now Hong Kong-based tycoon. Kuok’s first wife and mother of some of his children was Eurasian but he later married a Chinese and emphasized his Chinese ethnic identity. In a recent book, “Asian Godfathers” Kuok was described by an in-law as “the biggest racial bigot I have ever met.”

Among the non-Malay groups, inter-ethnic marriages are generally much more common than among Malays. However it also seems the case that migration is the preferred option for the numbers of Malaysians who either marry across ethnic lines or acquire foreign spouses while studying or working abroad. This particularly applies to Malay women who are either not particularly religious or who see no reason why their spouses should convert.

By one estimate, there are some 150,000 mixed marriages in Malaysia, a number that seems impossibly small in a population of 24 million. The leafy, winding streets of Damansara Heights and Kenny Hills abound with matrons who entered into marriage and lives of leisure with well-to-do Malays straight out of the universities of England, where the government had sent their mates. It is forbidden for a Muslim to marry a non-Muslim, so these women, with their servants and their huge homes, stop being Jean and become Jehan in public, although seldom in private.

But while the list of Malay elites is long and rich with instances of intermarriage, at the lower economic levels the list is short, and increasingly circumscribed by the growing power of Malaysia’s shariah, or Islamic religious courts. The issue was brought to the fore in the case of Lina Joy, who changed her name from Azlina Jailani and became a Catholic in an effort to marry a non-Muslim.

With scores, perhaps hundreds, of outraged Muslims outside the courtroom, demanding that she be denied the chance to change her religion on her identity card, a high court ruled in May that she was subject to the jurisdiction of the shariah court. The shariah courts have allowed one conversion in history – for a woman who had been dead for decades.

The result is that either people do not marry, or they emigrate. Bright women who have preferred to marry foreigners found their husbands denied work permits. There are believed to be thousands living in Australia, Canada or the United Kingdom.

For Malaysia’s young to take their cues from Malaysia’s top politicians and the cream of society outside of official policy might not be a bad idea. Shamsul Amri Baharuddin, the Director of the Institute of the Malay World Civilisation (ATMA) and Professor at University Kebangsaan Malaysia (UKM) in Bangi – and himself married to an Australian, says Abdullah Badawi’s marriage to Jean Danker Abdullah is “not a catalyst but certainly symbolic.”

Marina Mahathir told Asia Sentinel that “If people think that marrying into another culture is enriching, then it will be a good thing. But some people make one person give up their own culture because they think of it as inferior.”

But so long as the elite indulges in kris-waving while marrying as it pleases, multiracial nation-building may have scant grass roots impact.